"The Conversation"

Caring from a Distance (CFAD) has been contacted by long distance family members trying to help their relatives in the hospital arrange for transition care. In each case, it was unclear whether there were any advance directive forms in place. Without the proper documents, they found it was more difficult to communicate with the hospital staff. While there has been much discussion on the recent proposal to help reimburse doctors who meet with families to discuss options, the reality of getting forms in place during urgent situations has taken back burner.
As these concerned family members learned, getting and signing appropriate forms when the patient is in the hospital is not easy. First, it is necessary to have the proper forms in hand. Second, a patient may not be in the right mental state to sign documents. Third, it may be necessary to have the documents notarized, and many hospitals do not have a notary on site.
None of these elements reduce stress.
If you have found yourself in a similar situation, or can see this as a potential time bomb, now is the time to act. On the Caring from a Distance website at www.cfad.org, the Glossary Button on the bottom of the Home page defines what these documents are, and links to a comprehensive American Bar Association check list giving further information.
Whether or not the government reimburses providers to counsel you, it is very important to “have the conversation” with your loved one, so that everyone understands what Advance Directives are, and who has what responsibility. These are vital tools to help you implement the wishes of your loved one.
The long distance caregiver may need a local surrogate to act as a back-up, if necessary.
It is useful to have more than one copy of original documents. It is important that they be shared with ALL relevant parties.