To Those Whom This May Concern,
I appreciate your concern and am taking precautions as you suggest, I have actually changed my path in life because of what you just described. I have taken a 'hobby' in writing and have turned it into a career, I actually do more with my time and have less demands on me personally. This job is forcing me to go outside my comfort zone and actually go outside and talk to someone instead of doing so on my computer as I have for the last three years.
I cannot be a trauma therapist because of the damage done to my brain, I get that (Scott Lee).
Last week I spent an entire day fully present and did not dissociate one minute of the day...the first time in 19 years I had the whole day to myself. I cried for three days afterward and had three more days of being fully present I called everyone to tell them I was home, that I made it...it was like I really just stepped out of that Airliner in 1991. My family support me and I am making more veteran contacts in two weeks than I have in this town in 20 years. Read my latest article at examiner.com and find out what I am really doing, my website is kind of like 'Jerry Springer in Ky doing veterans issues.' A joke? No, I have changed the national conversation by writing at my site for those three years. Phrases and quotes I have been using for three years now dot the landscape of the Combat PTSD news scape. It is referenced by universities across the US as a depository of Combat PTSD statistics; my research gathered during college brings 75% of my traffic. My website has been completely downloaded by numerous databases and indexed with a Google page rank of 4. This would be a waste if I did not use it to stand tall as I have always done and shout it out until I am heard and now I will keep doing so until something is being done.
I am doing just that myself, my latest research is to access veterans resources in Louisville, KY and then put together a non-profit organization as a clearing house to marshal the resources and distribute services throughout every community. I bring together combat veterans and their families and talk about what really goes on behind those closed doors of the Combat PTSD home. I have four other writers at my site, my son, a reservist wife, an Army wife and a mother whose son is incarcerated will be joining soon. The Coalition of the Combat PTSD Bloggers is the next phase of media evolution in veterans issues and how we use the information we have amassed in a way to impact these families in their communities. I am drafting the resolution now and have detailed a brief on my
LinkedIn profile.
Am I healed? I keep hearing that and say, no not completely. I will say that I have healed more in the last two months by talking to my family in a real way that helped me regain 50% of my memories from the time during and after the war...because I did not remember before they filled in the details for me. What seemed like nightmares because fear of the unknown is greater than the truth. While it was hard to hear I validated what happened to them and doing so I was given back most of my memories. I cried for part of that three days with also.
I have had every kind of therapy, treatments, hospitalizations, medications and crap heaped on me for 19 years. I stop taking 4 antidepressants, 2 months later I find more healing than I have in my entire life. I still take
all 5 of my PTSD medicines (and probably won't freak out...
), just not that crap that made me feel dead inside.
My life has totally changed for the better, I am waiting on a service dog that has been donated. I will fly out to Colorado in August to the 6th annual Psychiatric Service Dog Handlers Society Gathering to learn how to train a service dog. It will be an Irish Setter, I excited about that also.
Scott A. Lee
Louisville Veteran's Issues Examiner
Journalist, Editor and Milblogger
Read the complete post at http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/PtsdASoldiersPerspective/~3/JQijCLBtFHE/scott-lee-combat-veteran-milblogger-am.html
Posted
Jun 28 2010, 11:58 AM
by
PTSD, A Soldiers Perspective