The Sow We Reap

How about a dose of reality for myself? Can I truly come to terms with the issues that I face today? Lets see.

I have been dissociating quite a bit lately; physical and emotional numbing, and completely shutting down mentally along with feeling alone. My girlfriend has taken in two of her nieces from her ex-husbands side of the family by court order (did you follow that?). Instead of her and I getting together on our customary weekends, she NOW has to be present when the kids parents visit. The parents have a no contact order, so they cannot visit on the same day. So, every weekend my girlfriend does not have the time to spend with me. I know, I know I have been dribbling along a little, well ok a lot. Anyway, with school going on (like I study, ha), working at my internship and finals coming up soon I do not have the time during the week. Needless to say, but we have seen each other very little for the past two months. This *** sucks, not the whole foster care thing for her ex-in law nieces or whatever they are called (no animosity here, right?), but I need to see my girlfriend!!!!!! Oh yeah did I say I have been procrastinating (which you probably inferred from above) on turning in my papers? Between school and my internship I have about 40 pages of papers to write!!!!! This WEEK!

Seriously though, I have been so zoned out and out of touch with life that to sit and be numb is the easiest thing to do. I am mentally drained, my last reserves are depleting now. It will take many prayers and well wishing for me to get through his week.