I received this email from a reader which touches on a common situation facing spouses of combat veterans. I have an understanding between myself and my Higher Power that he will send people my way and my part is to point out that they have been chosen to advance the cause of their personal experiences with respect to the dilemmas they face.
We as humans will be surprised at the depths of suffering we can survive and the heights in which we can prevail. I am always telling people, "You will be surprised at what you can do when faced with hardship and how much you can handle when given the right tools to succeed."
Her email,
I have spent hours reading your blog and trying to understand. I am proud of my husband…for what he did for our country. I am not proud of the hateful man he is now. I love him and will forever stand beside him, but can you give me any idea of where I, as the wife, can go to gain assistance with dealing with the insanity that comes with being married to a man with PTSD. I am at my wits end and tired of crying and trying to be strong and support him.
My response,
I would suggest that you get involved with some organizations that advocate for the family of combat veterans with PTSD. I am certain that women in your area have similar situations to find the support that you need. You cannot go through this alone, it will destroy you and your relationship with your husband. Does he want to seek help, or has he been receiving help? Either way if you want to remain sane throughout the process then get active in your life, find support, advocate for better care for our veterans & support for families. If you have a lack of organizations or support groups in your area then start one.
Think of this as an opportunity to advance the standard of care for our veterans and the support of the families. Keep researching to better understand your husband and to better understand your self in this situation and reactions to his behavior.
I believe that my experiences in life will serve a higher purpose and that I have been chosen by God to prepare myself to become a combat trauma therapist. With my unique insights from both sides of the prism of PTSD, I will be able to empathize and help my clients in such a way as to guide them out of the fog of war and into productive lives. Maybe, you have been chosen to do similar work to advance the cause of increasing awareness and support for spouses and families of combat veterans.
Do not forget that this has completely changed your life, now it is up to you to turn your experiences into a force for change.
- Educate yourself to better understand your internal processes
- Review your internal values and belief systems
- Reevaluate your life's direction outside of work
- Get involved with women of combat veterans
- Find the inner warrior to combat the stigma, lack of care and understanding
- Begin to seek out your new path in life
If I left something out or you have more suggestions for our newfound friend, please post a comment.
Read the complete post at http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/PtsdASoldiersPerspective/~3/_XH8EtXA2ds/wife-of-combat-veteran-seeks-guidance.html
Posted
Aug 23 2009, 09:26 AM
by
PTSD: A Soldier's Perspective