JBM: A Modest Proposal

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Spencer Ackerman is having fun: What Yglesias fails to understand is that the ideology Stack subscribed to is the problem. All across the country are sleeper cells preaching hatred of the tax code, gathering in public to denounce the results of a democratic election and sow the seeds of sectarian violence. They even have a major television network sympathetic to their sick agenda. The threat is there for all to see. The proper response is to go on offense. Intelligence is crucial to anticipatory self-defense, so we must authorize the use of enhanced interrogation methods to break their determined resistance. Similarly, we need to authorize lawful methods of widespread data collection, known as the Teabagger Surveillance Program, to enable us to gather the dots necessary for putting together the puzzles of future attacks. Working with our partner intelligence agencies overseas, we will rely on humane but tough methods employed by our partner agencies in more appropriate legal environments. The gloves are off. Of course, we have determined that as long as this Long War continues, it will be necessary to conduct the same sorts of detention operations that have featured in all previous wars. Accordingly, we ought to work to design a military commissions system for trying detainees for their war crimes. To rule out its applicability on American citizens would only encourage future radicals to recruit Americans. The important thing to remember is that this can’t be treated as a law enforcement matter. The military is most properly in the lead here, and so we need to use our military to go on offense, busting up the cells and meeting places and safe havens the extremists use to hone both their ideological and their combat skills. Defending America is a serious business. But all peace-loving conservatives should know that this campaign is not directed at them, but rather the sick extremists within their midst who pervert a great political tradition. We will encourage, and expect, those patriotic conservatives to cooperate with intelligence and military officials against those extremists So, that means we get to be the Accidental Guerrillas! This should be fun (especially since we've already infiltrated the military he's planning to use against us). Let's check the plane-bomber's manifesto to find out what we're fighting for: ...institutions like the vulgar, corrupt Catholic Church... ...two "interpretations" for every law: one for the very rich, and one for the rest of us... ...The communist creed: From each according to his ability, to each according to his need. The capitalist creed: From each according to his gullibility, to each according to his greed. Catholic-hating 'there are Two-Americas' communism??? Really? I'm not fighting for that. It's a disappointment to us too, Attackerman. Still, unfortunately, this one time we have to be on the same side. Next time, though!

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Posted Feb 19 2010, 09:30 AM by BLACKFIVE